I have two beautiful daughters who turned one year old last February. They are identical twins and are the sweetest human beings I have ever encountered. As time passes, I can’t help but remember what we went through as a family to be where we are right now. You see, I gave birth to my twins prematurely. Yes, they were preemies and I am one proud preemie mother. My daughters went through a lot the moment they came out to this world. It was the hardest battle we fought and by the grace of God, we were victorious. To know more about our story, take time to read my other blog.👉 My Twin Girls Story
I’m writing this blog for all preemie moms out there who are fighting and praying for their little ones. I want to share to you a few things that you should know as a preemie mother.
1. Preemie babies are strong
Babies are born strong and fearless. No matter how tiny and fragile your preemie may look, believe in your heart that he/she has a strong fighting spirit and that God is fighting with her/him. Preemies are said to have the strongest will to survive. Let them know and feel that you are fighting for and with them.
2. Set aside your fears
Watching your baby in the NICU with wires and tubes is scary and overwhelming. But what your baby needs at the moment is a strong parent who knows and believes that he/she can win over the battle. Babies can feel how their mothers feel. Learn to set aside your fears and be strong for your baby. They need all the positive energy they can get.
3. You are enough for them
I know, as a preemie mom myself, that most of us feel like we are not capable to raise a preemie. Turning a preemie into a healthy baby is a challenge already. Making them gain weight and reach the average weight level is challenging enough. But do not dwell on your lack and insecurities, you are enough for your baby. You are their world and they need you more than ever. Trust your instincts and do what you think is best. God placed you there for a reason. God knows your capabilities and He believes in you. So brush off any doubts you have and embrace your role as a mother head on with God by your side.
4. Stop comparing milestones
Preemies are expected to show developmental delays because of prematurity. Scientifically, this is true. I know, as moms, we feel frustrated and pressured when tracking our preemie baby’s milestones. I learned that we should stop comparing our baby to another baby, preemie or not. This will only cause frustration and disappointments. Babies have their own pace. Do not pressure them to be who they are not yet ready to be. They need love and support, not competition. Preemie babies are amazing babies. Celebrate their victories and their milestones.
5. Encourage and stimulate
Though preemies are expected to have developmental delays scientifically, this is not a good reason to just wait and see. I learned that encouragement and stimulation helps fast track their developments. Encourage them with toys and sounds. Play with them. Use any materials that can stimulate their movements and actions. Talk to them everyday. Be intentional with your playtime. Babies love it when they feel encouraged to do something.
6. Do not treat them as fragile and weak
I know, as preemie moms, it’s natural for us to worry and protect our babies from any unwanted circumstance. That is totally understandable after all you have to go through to keep them healthy. But being overprotective and treating them like they are fragile and weak does not help them at all. Allow them to explore what they are capable of and treat them like a normal healthy baby. Keeping them inside a bubble will only cause more delays and problems. Learn to let go and just be there to assist and support. Remember, you would not have been allowed to bring them home if they were still fragile and in need of special care. Your babies are well and healthy, believe that.
Preemie moms go through a lot of things. We were deprived of the chance to celebrate our first day of motherhood. We were faced with pain and heartbreak the moment we heard that our babies had to stay in the NICU for quite a time. NICU time was the hardest part of all. We did not get the chance to hold and carry them as much as we want. But, that made us the strongest person that we can ever be.
My girls are doing so much better now. They are healthy, active and happy. Miraculously, they never had developmental delays, infact, they were fast in reaching their milestones. At 1 year and 4 months, they can walk, run, go up and down the stairs, climb, sit, drink from a straw, drink from a cup and are talkative and interactive as they can be. I’m not trying to brag, I just want to show you that preemie babies don’t stay preemies forever and they definitely can beat science and statistics. God works wonders and miracles. You just have to believe. I hope that this helps you and inspires you in your motherhood journey.
Lots of love,
Debbie Gee ❤️